What Does Mama Say?

Ask Kennady and she'll tell you "wah wah wah." This used to be what a baby said, but now it's what every person says. And any animal that she doesn't know. But today, maybe she is right.

I really don't think that I am cut out for this single mother thing. Kennady is driving me bananas. Yesterday she opened her "Chicken Dance" playing card over and over and over again, until I ripped it out of her hands and hid it. She absolutely refuses to sleep in her own bed, and instead prefers to sleep on top of me. She talks in her sleep. Today I was woken up by a little girl pulling off my covers and telling me to "Get up." I hate it when people pull off my covers. She won't eat at meal times and when she asks for something to eat, then I make it, she takes two bites and is done. She threw things around the room while I was trying to clean up. She thinks it's funny to smack me in the face. She sleeps sideways in my bed. Every time we get in the car she wants to drive and throws a huge fit when I don't let her. I tell her it's not my fault, the state of Idaho is to blame for not letting 21 month olds drive. She just screams. She likes to throw things across the room, like my cell phone, but luckily the salesman was right, it's a pretty sturdy phone. She yells at me when I get her dressed because she wants to wear her Tinkerbell shirt. She insists on getting her own little shopping cart or the giant car one at the grocery store. Then she refuses to push the little cart or sit in the car and I am left with a retarded shopping cart, while trying to drag a screaming toddler. Eventually I forget nearly everything I came to the store to get, regardless of whether I have a list or not. She likes to push every button she sees (well and the invisible ones that I have). She turns off the tv if it's not a cartoon. She dances on tables. She hurts herself in public and causes big scenes. She colors her hair with highlighters (I thought only high schoolers did that?) She unplugs the vacuum while I am vacuuming. She asks for a glass of water, takes a few sips and dumps the rest on the floor. She takes off her shoes every time we get in the car. She helps herself to any snacks she can find. She refuses to walk when I have groceries to carry. She sticks DVDs in the VCR (I'll just be thankful it's not a sandwich....yet). She takes one bite out of everything. She runs away with my phone whenever I let her talk on it. When my hands are full and she insists to be carried, she goes completely limp when we reach the stairs. And that all was just today.

Some how, after all of it, even though it's 2 hours past her bedtime and she has wet hair from all her tears from her tantrums, when she climbs on my lap and says, "I love you too," I feel pretty lucky. I'm not sure why she says "I love you too" instead of just "I love you." But I guess she is right there too, because I did love her first.

Still, I would really like my husband back, please. Now. I'm sure he's thinking he'd rather not come back, since he's had a couple of weeks of uninterrupted sleep and he knows he's going to be on kid duty for awhile when he gets back. A long while. I sure hope he enjoyed his first-run movie tonight while I was putting Kennady to sleep for the fifth time. Perhaps he'll be disappointed that I'm not quite as cool as Angelina Jolie the super spy when he gets home. Well, for better or worse, dear, forever.