I Am So Funny

I am so glad we are not trying to go anywhere this weekend, because the weather is miserable. Which I guess is perfect for Ben, because he is pretty miserable trying to survive the weekend before finals week. I am so very tired of snow. I suppose I should move out of Rexburg.

Ok, that has nothing to do with why I am funny. My funniness comes from my most awesomest April Fool's joke. Way better than taping the sprayer on the sink....every single year... and mom falling for it every time. You would think she would be suspicious the one day of the year we ask for oatmeal. And even more funny than the time I got my cousin (or was it aunt?) to take me to the Dollar Store to buy magnetic earrings so I could fool my parents into thinking I got my ears pierced. Ok, so that was a pretty good one when I was 12. And be warned, it was a little mean, but I suppose that is why it was so funny. Or so I thought.

So I asked a friend a very awkward question, and then went to WalMart and braved the disapproving glances of passerbys to buy the very last pregnancy test in the store. Now maybe there are just a lot of people who think they are pregnant (in this town, that could very well be), or perhaps I wasn't the only one who decided to be a little cruel this April Fool's. Why the disapproving glances? Because my child was throwing the biggest temper tantrum ever, because I wouldn't let her run lose through WalMart and hold the goldfish (the live ones, not the crackers...only the mother of a toddler would have to clarify that). I'm sure they were thinking how irresponsible I am to have another one when I can't control the one I already have. The checker looked downright sad for me. Poor lady, I am sure she thought.

So then I took this test to my friend's house and had her pee on it while I watched our 18 month olds run around. I then offered to watch her kid so she and her husband could go out to dinner, because she really is pregnant. I made sure to call Ben during the day and reserve time for us to talk later in the day. Hee hee, that always makes him nervous. He showed up in the middle of the day, and nearly ruined the whole scheme, but I just made up something about Kennady being a handful that day and being grouchy and so forth. When he got home the second time, I was ready. I started with "Do you want the good news, the bad news, or just the news?" He was already sweating. So then I started on some rant about forgetting birth control, making sure it sounded more like a nervous ramble, and then just showed him the test. He was stunned. "What? Are you kidding? That's ... exciting!" With a super awkward grin. I could see that he was very near an aneurysm or a heart attack or mental breakdown, or something. So I didn't let it go on as long as I had considered. I said "April Fool's!" And then he slumped, hit his head against the wall and somehow managed to keep himself from tears. And I laughed and laughed and laughed and then gave him a big kiss. "You are so funny," he said. Then he asked how I got the pregnancy test to look positive, and I told him it was positive, and that I am talented. And then I told him the truth. He doesn't hate me forever, because he's a good sport, and instead just acknowledges that I got him good. I figured I would since he's so all consumed in finals and the MCAT, I know, a cheap shot. But so worth the awkward questions, disapproving glances, $4, and babysitting services.